Very little crowd reaction.
AZAUL: Those that know me know, and have followed my career, know I'm really not one to do this. I guess it's because I'm too subtle to grandstand, always thinking too much to be concise, and not political enough to have a boss or commissioner or official that I felt the need to tear into. But there is something someone told me that just crumpled up my heart.
Azaul lowers the mic and appreciates the anticipation. Suddenly, he raises it up again, and says slowly and loudly.
AZAUL: "TSW sucks." "TSW doesn't belong in the NWC."
He pauses again as the crowd boos nonchalant.
AZAUL: That's what I said. When this guy said those things to me I just looked at him and said "Booooo". He looked at me like I was a crack addict, so I had to elaborate. I told him that the TSW is what the NWC has desperately needed; something completely new. There have been folded federations, and region hopping, and dozens of likewise problems with the federations that aren't the cornerstones.
Mild applause cut Azaul off. He smiles shamefaced and lets them ride. Once they are done, he continues.
AZAUL: So this guy retorts "But look at the guys on the roster. Corpse, Damion Sioban, even you are big name guys that just don't seem to care. You cared everywhere else, you cared at Across Enemy Lines, why don't you care in the TSW?" And I hate to say it, but the little punk was right. We've all been dicked around the NWC when MSW/LSW closed, and then PCW soon after. But we're starting a downward spiral. We're worried the TSW might fold, leave us stranded again, so we don't commit. And because the TSW's headliners aren't committing, the level of enthusiasm is down, so there's less fan interest, ergo, TSW slowly fails. So right now I am...
He takes a pensive moment to himself, then smiles enthusiastically.
AZAUL: Decreeing. I am decreeing. I am making a decree that all the TSW roster just put their balls on the cutting block and trust that our talent gets the fans to love us and this whole damn fed the way we know it deserves to be loved.
The fans begin to whoop, holler, and cheer.
AZAUL: And I may not be the most stellar example of a man dedicating to this fed, but damn it, at least I see that now. And everything, every little thing about me and the way I look at my career is getting brushed up, and wax to a delicate shine. Because as of right now, Azaul is Mr. TSW. Well, not as in I'm changing my name, because that's a lame thing to do. Just ask everyone that owns old Jeff Boyardee merchandise. What this federation needs PR, it needs to develop a soul. So I will be the soul man, I am taking up the role of TSW PR. And starting tonight, I am going to find out everything that those guys in the back feel, I am going to be in touch with the fans-
Cheap but inevitable pop.
AZAUL: And I am going to start by making my NWC career mean a damn thing by winning some frikin' gold!
The fans have been riled, and Azaul is hopping happy in the dead center of the ring, right on the S of the TSW logo.
The lights of the arena go out…
JO: And his opponent, “The Sadist,” Damion Siobhan!
The crowd boos the man who must face their beloved Azaul.
Voiceover: "8... 7... 6... 6... 6... 5... 4... 3... 2... 1"
Immediately the heavy guitar of "The Heretic Anthem" by Slipknot kicks in followed by a frantic drum beat. "The Sadist" Damion Siobhan appears in the entrance, and he is immediately met by disapproval from the crowd. .
JH: And we are underway. I have to say, in my many years of watching pro wrestling, I may have never seen a speech delivered with such truth behind it, such blunt respect as I saw right there by Azaul…
ST: Please, what a suck-up. All he really said was “Crowd, love me!”
The crowd pops.
JH: QUICK ROLL-UP BY AZAUL!
ST: Oh, no way! NO FRICKIN’ WAY!
1…
2…
JH: And a kickout by the Sadist.
ST: Actually, that looks like a continual kickout, as Siobhan just won’t stop kicking… GET HIM! KILL THE SUCK-UP!
JH: Azaul retreats, WAIT! NO! WHAT AN ANKLELOCK!
ST: How the… Siobhan was kicking…
JH: Azaul with an anklelock out of nowhere! Can Siobhan make it to the ropes?!?
ST: And Azaul stepped back…
JH: He’s close! I don’t think he’s gonna make it… The endurance of even this hardcore monster is being tested… What an early showing by Azaul!
ST: And then Azaul grabbed his foot… How the…
JH: HE MAKES IT!
ST: And Azaul, like a sucker, lets the hold go. You keep that hold on until they cry “MEDIC!” Pansy…
JH: Azaul is going for the win, not the loss…
ST: Well, the Sadist just got up, doesn’t look like Azaul is winning to me…
JH: They lock up again… Azaul sends the Sadist into the ropes… Dropkick attempt by a dominant Azaul…
ST: …But the Sadist rolls out of the way… Look at that grin on Siobhan’s face!
JH: Azaul gets back up, obviously disappointed-
ST: AND DEAD! THERE IS NO GOD!
JH: HUGE CLOTHESLINE BY SIOBHAN! WOW!
ST: Did you hear the noise he made when he landed… That was great…
JH: Azaul tries to get to his knees, but Siobhan is now the hunter, and he uses his advantage to keep control. He picks Azaul up by the hair…
ST: This is gonna be great…
JH: Whips Azaul into the ropes, and follows him in…
ST: How the mighty have fallen…
JH: NO! NO! NO!
ST: Oh, did Siobhan knock poor little Azaul out of the ring with ANOTHER clothesline? How foolish of him. Now he’ll have to follow him outside…
JH: And he does… I have to say, this isn’t the place Azaul wants to be…
*CLANG*
[BOOOOOO!]
ST: I think Azaul would have to agree with me and say “Neck first on the guard rail,” was actually worse than being outside…
JH: Just sick… Sick and wrong. Siobhan isn’t a wrestler, he’s a-
ST: -Winner. Just like me. Me and Damien, winners…
JH: What’s he doing now? There’s nothing legal under the ring.
ST: More importantly, there is nothing illegal outside the ring…
JH: Stop laughing, this isn’t funny. Not at all… The Sadist has a chair…
ST: Azaul has a problem…
JH: Azaul lunges at the stalking Siobhan, grabs him by the tights…
*SMACK*
ST: CHEATER! CHEATER!
JH: And it is the Sadist’s turn to eat guardrail! Both men down… Azaul glances at the chair laying besides Siobhan… He gives it a second look… From the crowd reaction, I’d say they want him to use it…
ST: GET UP, SIOBHAN! GET UP!
JH: Too bad he’s not the Masochist… He’d be in heaven any second now…
ST: GET UP!
JH: WAIT! WHAT AN ACT OF… OF…
ST: STUPIDITY! Why would you roll Siobhan into the ring when you could hit him with the chair?!? WHY?
JH: Azaul wants to beat this man, right in the middle of the ring. He wants to prove that he doesn’t need a chairs to win… AND HE MAY HAVE IT! HE MAY HAVE IT!
ST: Oh, no… Flint…
JH: Big suplex… He holds on…
ST: NO! STEEL! NO!
JH: The submission is locked on! Azaul’s gameplan has been on target! Wow, I think he has him…
ST: NO! Don’t tap! ESCAPE! ESCAPE!
JH: Siobhan is an amazingly tough individual… You’d already be crying like a little girl, but still this man hold on…
ST: Escape… Escape… Please… Esc…
JH: Siobhan has no where to run to, no rope to grab, nothing… Just look at the pain on his face… He needs to tap!
ST: e… e…
JH: AND SIOBHAN ROLLS IT OVER INTO A BRIDGE PIN! HOW?!?! HOW?!?!
ST: He’s the man, that’s how!
1….
2….
JH: And Azaul kicks out! Siobhan may have had Azaul on shock alone with that one, but you could really tell that the submission had really taken the air out of him, and it was enough for Azaul to escape…
ST: NO!
JH: Azaul back on his feet… Desperation double leg takedown by the Sadist… Both men on their hands and knees… Azaul still in better shape that Siobhan, I think…Azaul gets back up… LOWBLOW! COME ON, REF!
ST: The submission hold took too much out of Siobhan, and his aim was off. That, combined with his lack of strength, caused that unfortunate lowblow…
JH: Siobhan has been forced to cheat time and time again in this match, just to survive! He’s showing his true colors… Azaul staggers to his knees… Siobhan’s already up and grinning, what is he planning?
ST: Azaul really shouldn’t keep his back turned…
JH: Azaul gets to his feet…
ST: He really should turn around…
JH: VISION BLUR!
ST: YE-
JH: NO! Azaul reverses into a despereation Front face DD-
ST: NO: Reversed again, into a HUGE PILEDRIVER!
JH: Siobhan leaps at the opportunity, grabbing Azaul by the hair… These two men know each other well, and it shows… What a set of reversals…
ST: Know what the reversal is to a snap powerbomb?!? NOTHING!
JH: And just like that, the ball has rolled into Siobhan’s court. If he goes for the pin, he could get him… He drags Azaul into the center of the ring… What is that sick gleam in his eyes?!?
ST: PAYBACK! PAYBACK! PAYBACK!
JH: And now it’s Azauls turn to fight to survive! Camelclutch locked on by the Sadist… This could be it…
ST: YEAH! THE EYES! GO FOR THE EYES!
JH: Oh, come on! Can this man go a minute without cheating?!? I mean, really… The ref breaks up the hold… Siobhan refuses to let go… Stern warning by the ref… And the Sadist lets go of the lock…
ST: He still owes Azaul for the rail incident.
JH: What are you talking about?!? That was payback for the-
ST: Don’t cover for the cheater…
JH: Both men up… And Siobhan runs headfirst into a dropkick! Oops. v ST: What the… Why is he here?!?
JH: And the owner is coming down the isle, Sigurd himself… Well, this could make things interesting… Azaul picks up Siobhan…
ST: The… Owner… Has a chair…
JH: The chair that the Sadist dropped earlier, to be precise… What does that mean? Oh, NOT AGAIN!
ST: He just has never recovered from that submission hold. If he’d just ben able to form a fist…
JH: OH, PLEASE! Siobhan went straight for the eyes! Azaul is blinded and down!
ST: NO!
JH: And the owner is on the apron! He calls Azaul over… Azaul struggles to his feet, wiping his eyes.
ST: HOW FAIR IS THAT?
JH: The owner just offered Azaul the chair! He just offered to give Azaul this match! Azaul turned him down! Azaul wants this to be a wrestling match! He turns away from the own-
*SMACK*
JH: …
ST: NEVER REFUSE THE OWNER!
JH: The ref turns around, but the damage is done! Azaul is out cold!
ST: Ne… Ver….
JH: The Sadist is all smiles… This isn’t fair!
1…
2…
3…
JH: Chalk this one up to poor management skills! What a tragedy! Is there any justice?!?
ST: Yes there is… After having to come back from being flung face first into the guardrail, the sadist came back and took this match the only way he knows how…
JH: Through cheating and weapons…
ST: No, by having his hand raised… I see a bright future ahead for him, and so does Sigurd, the wisest owner of all time.
JH: Wisest owner of all time? Now who is the suck up.
ST: *TWITCH*
You have got to love them commercial breaks cause here comes one more!